On The Air

Airlines and ferry boats conspire to split the Race up into three mini-races of two teams each, each about six hours apart, with Eric and Danielle stuffed in the middle all by themselves. Very early on it’s obvious that it will be a race between Teri and Ian and the Guidos for elimination. Read it all.

Episode links:
Miss Alli’s recaplet
TV Guide review
TV Squad review
Download the episode with BitTorrent

Previously on The Amazing Race: Rats and fingernails. Non-elimination.

Currently on The Amazing Race: Teams get the heads up that they need to fly up the coast of Africa, to Tanzania, then catch one of three ferries to the island of Zanzibar. Sounds simple? Yeah, check back in thirty minutes once everyone’s arrived. The biggest problem that people run into is that every single flight out of town, like every one, is full, so all seven teams need to fly standby. As you can imagine, this doesn’t do so well for getting everyone bunched together. In fact, the teams get spread out over four flights and twenty-four hours. I think it’s safe to say the first team checks in at the Pit Stop before the last teams have even landed. Usually the Race planners try to make sure this doesn’t happen, and there are enough flights for everyone so the teams aren’t this spread out. What happened? Did everyone in Africa decide to get on a plane that day?

Charla and Mirna are first at the airport, and they descend on some poor woman in an office in the middle of the night and try to use her phone to call the airline. There are the usual Charla and Mirna levels of chaos going on in this scene, so I don’t really know who they’re trying to call, or why the woman thinks it’s not a good idea to call, but it ends up with Charla giving the lady lessons on how to dial a phone. “You just dial. Hit. Hit. Hit,” she says as she punches her little fingers onto the desk. Why is it that every time they’re on screen I have to watch the thing four or five times just to figure out what they’re talking about?

Other teams get to the airport and end up talking to the same lady, so I guess she really is the go-to gal in the middle of the night. Nobody else tries to teach her how to perform rudimentary tasks, though.

When the airline counter opens the next morning, everyone finds out that the flight is already full so they all get on standby. There is another way to get there, but the connecting flight is also full and they’d have to get on standby at the other airport. Charla and Mirna go for it, figuring they’re just as bad off waiting on standby there as they are here, so why not? Everyone else watches them run off to catch their flight, then we see them making friends with “Cristo” the airline employee and forming a small prayer circle to try to get a standby seat. Somehow, it works. Cristo is even nice enough to get down on one knee to talk to Charla, just like you’re supposed to do with children.

So Charla and Mirna make their flight, and they end up actually in first place, before anyone else has a chance to even leave the first airport.

Back in Maputo, everyone’s finding out there are no standby seats open, so they have to run to a different counter to get on a different flight. But the counter isn’t open yet, so they’re all waiting around until an office door upstairs opens up. Everyone runs up there except for Teri and Ian and the Guidos, who stay behind waiting at the counter. The teams that run upstairs get tickets. Oh, but wait. Those four teams are only going to Johannesburg (the same place Charla and Mirna went to in the first place), and from there they’re on standby again. Is it really this hard to fly around Africa? Jeez. Teri and Ian and the Guidos get on the same flight, but they’re at the end of the standby list, because they waited until the counter opened. So they’re kind of screwed here.

They get to the connecting flight, and guess what? The four teams that went upstairs get standby seats, and the other two get nothing. I guess going upstairs has its advantages, you think? But then the guy at the counter looks at his computers and realizes that Eric and Danielle aren’t supposed to be on the plane. Like there were only enough standby tickets for three teams, not four. So the guy actually goes all the way to the plane, grabs Eric and Danielle, and tosses them off. Oops! They’re pissed, of course, and even more so when they find out the next flight isn’t until tomorrow. Ouch. And it’s standby only. Double-ouch.

Oh look Charla and Mirna. Are they still on this show? I forgot about them. They get to the ferry terminal, on a bright sunny day with few clouds in the sky, and are told that because of “the weather” their boat has been delayed until the next morning. Ha Ha! I smell producer interference, which is never kosher. I know they don’t like teams to get too far ahead or too far behind, because it screws with their schedules and Pit Stops and makes Phil have to scurry around like a madman, but to actually delay a team overnight like this, just because they have such a big lead? Not cool. The fact that it’s happening to these two makes up for the sour taste a little, but not much.

The other teams finally show up in Tanzania after dark. So this is like 24 hours since they’ve left the Pit Stop, most of that time spent waiting in airports. Not fun. And they get to the ferry dock only to find out…they’ve got to wait longer. Danny and Oswald get the first tag, which puts them on the 5:30 boat with Charla and Mirna, and Uchenna and Joyce and the Beauty Queens get on the second boat, leaving at 8:30. The other three teams? Yeah, they’re still at the other airport waiting for a flight. On standby. They’re so bored they’re dicking around with the ropes that make up the lines. And we have to watch it. That’s how little footage you get out of waiting in an airport for two days.

The counter finally opens, and Eric and Danielle finally get on a plane and jet off to Tanzania, leaving the other teams behind. So, more waiting!

Out on the open seas, majestic music brings us to the sailboat cutting through the open waters of the Indian Ocean, and Danny and Oswald sleeping peacefully on the deck. Then a record scratch and funky music as we pan over to Charla, retching over the side of the boat. Oswald becomes the hero by putting a cold cloth on her neck, and gets called a “doctor” for it, and is thanked for his “beauty tips”. And, it’s just a cold towel; I don’t think either one of those apply. But it’s good to hear Charla say the word doctor without adding an “o” at the end.

The last two teams are finally getting the hell on a plane to Tanzania. At the same time the lead teams are setting foot on Zanzibar. And, what’s this? A clue! A clue! The first clue of the game, and we’re at nineteen minutes and fifty-one seconds. You know, I get that airport hijinx are sometimes the hardest part of this game, and missing a flight or getting on standby first can put you in first or last place in a moment. But do we really need to see twenty minutes of it? Half the show before they get to their first clue? Not always.

Meanwhile Uchenna and the Beauty Queens are on the boat making slave jokes. Hilarious!

So the clue is a Detour, to either haul big logs on a cart or put a puzzle together. I would have said the logs would be faster, because you never know how tricky these puzzles are. And this one looks extra tricky. Mirna sees it and says “Are you kidding me?” But the funniest thing is that she’s saying it to nobody in particular, like to herself or to the camera, and she’s still using a Russian accent. But most all the teams take the puzzle and seem to get it done fast. So I’m glad I’m not having to pick between these Detours. Oswald and Danny finish first, and are directed to another cluebox. But they decide that, on the way, this is a perfect time to stop by a local market and get some fruit. Because, why not? You’ve been sitting around for three days, doing nothing, and you’re finally just now starting to get back into the Race, so why not dawdle? It’s not like a first place finish is on the line. Stupidly puzzling move. These guys do know how to slow down and smell the roses like pros, but they normally also know when it’s time to hustle.

So their little side trip gives Charla and Mirna enough time to get to the Roadblock (throwing sticks at a target) first. Mirna’s well into it before the guys arrive, and she does get done before them. They’re on their way to the Pit Stop, and check in with Phil in first place again. Did you ever think you’d see Charla and Mirna in first place two times in a row? Me neither. They each win a catamaran, and Phil should have brought a picture or something, because they have no idea what a catamaran is. They’re like, Yay?

Danny and Oswald are second. The moral? Know when to stop for fruit.

The next boat is landing, and Uchenna and Joyce do the puzzle while Dustin and Kandice haul the logs. Uchenna and Joyce are done first, by a long shot, it seems, so maybe the puzzle was faster.

Eric and Danielle get to the ferry boat, and even though there were only supposed to be three boats available, everyone knows it will be hours before the other teams show up. So they’re allowed to cast off. And indeed, we see the other teams still on an airplane, then landing and getting to the boats, but Eric and Danielle are long gone, and the next boat isn’t until 8:00 at night. Looks like we’ve got our bottom two picked out already.

Uchenna is throwing sticks, and it’s starting to get dark. Time is going by so quickly this episode. He hits the target, and they run to the Pit Stop. But they have a 30-minute penalty, remember? So they stand aside and wait. And wait. And wait. And finally their time is up, so Phil tells them they can check in. Wow. Those logs must have taken a loooong time.

The Beauty Queens are just now throwing sticks, which we see about two seconds of. I bet it took longer than that. And Eric and Danielle are getting off the boat, well after dark, and doing the puzzle. At the same time, Teri and Ian and the Guidos are getting on their boat. Everything in the last half of this episode is so rushed. I wonder why? Couldn’t have anything to do with the 20 minutes of airport footage.

The Beauty Queens check in, and Eric and Danielle check in some unspecified number of hours later. Between the planes and the boats, all these teams have to be separated by like six or seven hours. Charla and Mirna are probably leaving the Pit Stop right about now, unless they extended it to 36 hours because the other teams weren’t even on the island yet.

Speaking of the other teams, it’s time for their games to begin. They both do the puzzles, and it’s neck and neck, with the tense music and everything. The Guidos come out ahead in the end, and they take off, leaving Teri and Ian behind.

Now the sun is coming up. We’re at 18 hours after Charla and Mirna checked in.

The Guidos hit the Roadblock and start throwing sticks. Teri and Ian are in a taxi. You know the editors were wishing that both teams could have been at the Roadblock at the same time so there would be some tense footage to splice together, but Bill hits the target before the other taxi even gets there. So instead the editors have a little fun by showing his final throw in slow motion, his stick hurtling end over end towards the target. They grab their clue and it’s all over for Teri and Ian.

It’s not too bad. Teri and Ian were certainly more likable this season than they were in Season 3, when they were almost the villains because of their grumpiness and their yelling. This time around they seemed kinder and gentler, and like they were having more fun. But they were a disposable team, it’s it’s no big deal to see them go. Now there are only two more disposable teams left, Eric and Danielle and the Beauty Queens. If we can see them go, one after another, we’ll end up with a pretty awesome final four. Can’t wait!

But of course the Guidos are approximately 20 hours behind Charla and Mirna, and at least 8 hours behind Eric and Danielle. Shades of the first season, where the Guidos got so far behind that there was no way for them to catch up. I wouldn’t be surprised to see some kind of producer-created bunching come into play this time, though.

Next two weeks? I’m out of town on vacation. I’ll be watching, but I won’t be writing. You’re on your own. It looks hilarious, though. Charla’s a knight in shining armor, and her horse knocks her flat on her face. Pause, rewind, play. Pause, rewind, play. Pause, rewind, slow forward.